I hate, and I mean loathe when my MIL starts a sentence like this, "Im gonna tell you something, and you are not gonna like it, but I need to tell you any way". Oooooooo that burns me up. I just want to reach across the table and give her one good punch in the nose. BUT...... this is exactly how I feel I should start off my writing today. Go figure. LOL.
So I want to make my writings more open and less sugar coated. I may insult or upset a few people in the process, but after last nights Women's Conference, I feel that it is necessary to tell my story, and to tell it as honest as I can. I want my girls to really know me.
I have a good life. I love so much about my life. I have an awesome husband who loves me eternally. He doesn't even care that my weight has ballooned up to its highest in years. He still finds me sexy and beautiful. I question him, I'm not sure why, I should be thrilled that he finds me FABULOUS at all sizes, but I still question. I guess it is my own insecurity caused by years of being told believing that my worth is based on my weight. What a load of crap that was. So he adores me at all my many sizes. How wonderful is he!!! I have 4 beautiful girls of my own, and one step daughter that I have raised as my own. They are great kids. Just as smart as they are beautiful. I am able to stay at home with them each day. Eddie has a good job that allows me to do so, as longs as I stick to a tight budget.
Being a SAHM has its definite ups. But it also has it definite downs. It is not all Sunshine and lolly pops. Let me be very clear on the fact that I love being a SAHM, but holy crap these last 2 days have been H - E double hockey sticks. For instance, this morning I am fighting with my 3 and 5 year old to brush their teeth. Why is it every morning it is a HUGE surprise that they have to brush their teeth? I mean seriously!! We do it every day, and yet every day when I say, "go brush your teeth", they totally freak and lose their little minds. What is up with that? They gotta know that it is coming right? Then after 10 minutes of Brooklyn being in the bath room, I go to check and see that she has pulled my rollers out from under the sink and decided to take all the rollers out of the heater and put them on the counter and then paint them with what I am guessing is tooth paste. It is a lot like object art. I know that I should show patience and love and treasure this moment and praise her for her creativity, but my first reaction is to freak out all over her.
If that is not enough, Jacquelynn goes in and starts crying and yelling because Brooklyn is using "her" tooth paste. I had no idea that they all had different tooth pastes. So Jacquelynn is upset and shoves Brooklyn who falls on top of Sutton and cause Sutton to fall and bang her head on the wall. So now I have 3 crying kids, only one who is actually hurt. Why?
This does not even compeer to yesterdays, which I am now calling "poop day". So Brooklyn goes to the potty and decides to take Sutton in with her. Now Sutton has just entered the "put my hand in the toilet water" phase of her life. Because of this I have told all the family members to put the lid down after going potty. I might as well be talking to the air, does anybody in this house listen? Anyway, Brooklyn goes number 2, remember, Sutton is in the bathroom with her and forgets to put the lid down. So what do you think Sutton does? YEP! She goes over to the potty, puts her hand in as if fishing, and comes out with a small, round brown piece of poopy. Well by the time I got the door unlocked (since when did Brook start locking the door? I am the ONLY one in this house that locks the door) Sutton had the poopy in her mouth like it was a yummy piece of chocolate. Yes ladies and gentleman, my daughter ate poop. SICK!
The day went on with one thing after another. No joke. That same day, Jacquelynn was playing after Ballet class and came over to me screaming about something on her arm. Yep....a bid pooped on her arm. She was freaking out. I had do make it funny to calm her down. She was creating quite a scene. So, that is why yesterday will be forever known as "poop day".
Anyway, this is my glamorous life as a Domestic Engineer. It is awesome, but it is not at all awesome. I love it and I hate it. I treasure it and I wish I could forget it all. At the end of the day, it is the only life I would ever want. Except, I would add a bigger bank account. That would be cool. But I will save that for another day.
Angela
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